Dear Jamie,
We have been involved in many creative projects in the past. Each has required significant effort. This project less than any. I congratulate on your contribution so far. You’ve provided at least one letter to our nascent affair. But that’s not all, in an impressive example of multitasking you also happened to write at most one letter.
Don’t play it down. One is how many more Romeo and Juliets Shakespeare wrote than I have, and he’s significantly more influential than me. It’s also at least how many universes there are, and that’s quite big. I just can’t get over how weighty and significant that number can be, how astonishingly singular it is.
“No, no, no” you say, “It really was a shit effort of my behalf.” But my friend, do you realise how serious that sentence is? “a” shit effort. That’s “one” shit effort, I wouldn’t dare compare your effort to “one shit effort”, especially considering how massive that number can be (see above).
Disappointedly,
Mat